Following on from this ridiculousness from yesterday today was even stranger. I am almost tempted to use real names and explain more.
But I think it probably best not too. So many people that I know read this blog anyway and know the situation but it's best not to throw a red flag at a bull.
An incident happened this morning that made a lot of things clear and helped explain an awful lot of things that I have been mis interpreting.
I have however worked out what the issue actually is, and it's one of power games more than anything else. There is a perception on my friends behalf that I have been playing power games and he feels as though I have been intentionally making him look bad or trying to undermine his authority.
It's funny because nothing could be further from the truth, but in fantasy like reality, perception is king, and just the perception is enough to cause all the problems.
I was fuming over an incident this morning and I was all set to first off right a very nasty email basically hauling him over the coals, but decided not too as emails can be sent around, picked over and badly misconstrued.
I then decided that I was going to confront him over the telephone (in person would be better but he does not cope with any form of confrontation and would sand bag). But after thinking about what would be the possible outcomes of any form of confrontation, I sadly realised that the only outcome of any of these would be bad news and would have far reaching consequences.
So I am just going to have be careful to make sure that I am not playing power games and make doubly sure that the perception of power games or the perceived slight to his authority is mitigated.
This whole thing is such a waste of my time and energy. I was so upset over this today I probably wasted at least an hour of quality work time, only half concentrating on what I was doing.
It's interesting though I think I can now safely say the ball is in my court to mitigate the issue from happening in the future.
Sadly though the friendship I had is pretty much over, which is a significant shame, but I have tried time and time again to build it back up but I think today was the last shot. You can only take so much.
I think he's too stubborn to ever say sorry even if he understood the truth.
It's amazing that in twenty four hours I have gone from wanting to repair the friendship to realising that sometimes friendships go through natural progressions and sometimes even the best of friends must drift apart.
I thought a small musical interlude to today's post, it's 'For Good' from the Stephen Scwhartz musical Wicked. It's all about friends.
Labels: contemplation, friends, stress